Becoming Lady Thomas (Becoming Her Book 1) Read online

  “I like honeysuckle,” I grin. Visions of myself stretched across the bench while reading and suckling on the flower fill me with happiness.

  “I love honeysuckle,” he remarks without humor.

  My eyes find his, and I frown at him. I know we are talking about the flower, but his words have a double meaning. The thrill that shivers through me signifies that I like the double meaning.

  “Where did you find this plant?” I question in an effort to change the subject. “I’m from the countryside and we don’t have anything of the sort.”

  He scowls and turns away from my gaze. “It was given by an out-of-town traveler—someone not from our country. He owed me, and luckily for him, I accepted this unique plant as payment.”

  I feel as though he’s not being forthcoming with the rest of the story. “And?”

  His head snaps over at me. “And nothing.”

  I hold his gaze for several moments. “Jasper, this story upsets you. I’m not some dense woman who doesn’t know anything. I’m beginning to be able to read you, and this story stings you in some way. If I’m going to be your wife, you should tell me everything.”

  As soon as the last words leave my mouth, I jerk a hand up to my lips as to prevent any more odd things from spilling out. Why did I say that to him?

  He takes hold of my hands and leans forward. The kiss that brushes against my lips is sweet—thankful, even. And it tugs at my heart.

  “Honeysuckle,” he breathes against my lips, “you’re perfect. And you’re very perceptive.”

  I smile at his compliment, but it falls away when he sits back. I already miss his hot breath mixing with mine.

  “The traveler and I had become quite close despite our dealings. He was a professor, always researching something new. His research took him all over the world and thrust him further and further into debt. Instead of being firm with the eccentric man like I am with all of my other business dealings, I cut him slack. He wooed me with his gifts, like the plant, and I turned a blind eye.”

  A smile plays at my lips. “So he was a friend to you.”

  He snaps his head over to stare at me with a harsh look. “Indeed, he was. And on his way to visit me one day, he was murdered here in London, just one street over. He’d been carrying an ornate lamp and a bag full of spices from India. Someone killed him to take his gold-plated lamp, which he no doubt was bringing to gift to me.”

  I gape at him. Even though he’s angry, I can see the hurt in in his eyes. He loved this man.

  “What was his name?”

  This time, his lips break into a wistful smile. “His name was Gus.”

  Something in me hurts for him, and before I can stop myself, I tangle my hands into his hair and kiss him fiercely. My kiss is meant to put a salve on the burned heart in his body, to soothe the ache. It pains me that he lost someone so dear to him and is still visibly upset by it.

  He allows me to control the kiss and moans his appreciation into my mouth. For the first time, I feel connected to him in an emotional way. Clearly, we have no problems with physical attraction. But as we kiss, for the first time ever, I allow myself to truly accept that I could be his wife. And that I might actually like it.

  When I finally tear myself away from him, I feel an invisible tethering beginning to form between us. With each passing moment away from my family and William, I feel more like I belong here with Jasper.

  He takes my hands and smiles at me. “Dear Elisabeth, would you do me the honor in accompanying me to dinner tonight?”

  My heart patters in my chest. “Jasper, I would love to.”

  This time, he beams at me, and I’m almost blinded by the breathtaking beauty of it. His face lights up with a vulnerability he has yet to reveal to me. He truly does want to be with me. And even though he acquired me through that of a deal gone bad, he’s happy to have me. That much is plain as day.

  Maybe it is time for the girl I once was to be put to rest, for me to embrace the woman I’ve become.

  It feels right.

  I PULL MY TIMEPIECE FROM my pocket and check the time yet again. Ever since Elisabeth willingly agreed to a dinner date with me, my stomach has been in knots. My plan to woo her is working. And while it was a plan, every part of my endeavors to endear her to me have been genuine. The woman has been in my life for only a matter of a days, yet I know without a doubt I do love her.

  Flipping the timepiece over, I read the inscription. Gus brought it back with him from France.

  At the time, I smiled politely as I accepted the gift with the unusual inscription. However, now, as I think about Elisabeth, I understand what he meant. I have worked my entire life to build my empire, but it has never fully satisfied me. The passion was never there—I was only fulfilling a fate my father had passed on to me.

  Elisabeth is my passion.

  The moment I spied her red hair and knowing, green eyes in the portrait in their family home, I knew. My life would be about her.

  I took Gus’s words of advice and seized my precious honeysuckle.

  She’s my passion, and I’ll never let her go.

  Once the minute hand on the clock slides into place, I quickly pocket the timepiece and stride toward her bedroom door. I’ve been waiting for the past half hour just steps from her doorway—eager to see her again.

  My knock is brisk, and she takes her time answering. The animal inside me desires to fling the door open and find her. But the lover in me wants to give her a chance to come to me on her own. To give us a chance.

  A soft click signifies her opening the door, and I hold my breath as she comes through it. My eyes instantly find hers, and I grin.

  “Took you long enough, woman. The attempt to be a gentleman is a difficult task with your lack of haste.”

  She tosses a playful smile my way. “While I like the gentleman side of you, the domineering side is quite endearing as well.”

  The wink is my undoing, and I pin her against the wall.

  “You like when I press my cock against you, honeysuckle?” I growl as I dip my head to her neck and nip at the flesh.

  A gasp rushes from her. “Maybe.”

  Maybe?

  “If you want me to taste that tight cunt of yours again until you’re screaming my name, tell me what I want to hear. Do you like it when I press my cock against you?”

  “Yes,” she murmurs.

  I grow impossibly hard against her simply from one word. Knowing that, in her turned-on state, she might say yes to anything, I am tempted to ask her if I may make love to her. However, something inside me yearn for her to want it without any smoke or mirrors.

  “Good girl. I promise you that, after dinner, I will fuck that part of your body with my tongue until you beg for my cock instead.”

  She whimpers and my self-control wears thin.

  “Come. Let’s go indulge in the meal Gretchen has prepared for us.”

  I tear away from her and clasp her hand. It takes some tugging, because my God, I think she’d rather me make good on my promise, but I finally manage to drag her to the dining room. When I finally take her, I want there to be no hesitation on her part. I want her to beg and scream for it.

  As we reach the table, I pull a chair out and help her sit down before taking my own seat. The glow from the candles on the table flickers against her pale face, stealing some of her innocence—much like I plan on doing tonight. A slightly wicked look plays at her features.

  We eat in silence, our stolen glances at each other a form of foreplay. With each morsel she places into her mouth, my cock throbs for her. By the time we finish our meal, we’re mutually aroused to the point that I’m seriously considering taking her on the table.

  “What would you like to do now, honeysuckle?”

  Even in the darkened room, the blaze on her cheeks is visible. “I, uh, would like to get out of this constrictive clothing.”

  My cock thickens at her words. She’s shyly finding a way to get naked.

  “Do you n
eed some help?” I question with a raised eyebrow.

  “No. Uh, let me freshen up first. I discovered a robe earlier. I’ll wear that and meet you to, um, to talk.”

  She’s so goddamned adorable while stumbling over her words.

  “Unnecessary. Let me take you to my room now to ‘talk’ and I’ll undress you with my teeth.”

  Her hand sets to fanning herself at my words, which makes me grin at her.

  Unfortunately, she shakes her head. “You are incredibly impatient. I’ll be there in a short while. I can assure you the wait will be well worth it.”

  I groan at her insinuation but nod briskly. She bursts from her seat with a grin that owns my heart and shuffles away.

  “Twenty minutes,” I call after her, “and then I’m coming for you.”

  Her sweet giggle fills a part of my soul I never knew was empty.

  Who knew twenty minutes could seem like fucking forever?

  A knock on the front door startles me from staring at my timepiece as I will the minutes to tick by faster. I only have four more to wait. But who would be visiting at this time of night? Furrowing my brow, I stand and stride over to the door. When I open it, I’m face to face with Alexander, who is wearing a mischievous grin.

  “I did it.”

  His words confuse me. “Did what?”

  “I located them. Turns out, William does have a dirty little secret. And Edith is not as plain as you made her out to be, quite beautiful actually, but she does have a ruthless edge. In fact, I’m quite certain that, once I present her with my offer, she’ll leap at the opportunity.”

  I scowl at the mention of William’s name. “Could this not wait until tomorrow?”

  He shakes his head. “No. In fact, I conveyed to William that I would be informing Elisabeth of his secret. He was adamant that he be the one to tell her. All I did was grease the wheel and send it careening down the hill. Once he speaks his piece, then you, my friend, can swoop in and rescue your dear damsel in distress.”

  My eyes widen at his words. “He’s coming here?” I hiss.

  “Yes, brother. Give it time to play out. You needn’t hasten the process. It’s happening. Elisabeth will be yours after his confession, I assure you.”

  The thought of William even speaking to her boils my blood.

  “Once this blows over and you’re married to her, I want you both to come back to Havering with me. I’m sure I’ll have convinced Edith by then as well. Together, we’ll spin the tale for my father while you honeymoon by the River Beam. It won’t take long, and then I’ll send you on your way. Remember, you owe me this.”

  I grumble, but I know I will do that of which he asks. “I won’t allow her to speak to him alone. He might attempt to steal her away.”

  “She won’t go with him. That much I can tell you,” he swears.

  His grim look makes me fear what it is William is planning on telling her. I wanted her to forget about him—not break her heart in the process.

  “What happened?”

  He is opening his mouth to tell me when another knock raps at the door. This one is much softer.

  I shoot him a murderous glare. “Don’t put it past me to kill him with my bare hands.”

  Alexander squares his shoulders and prepares himself to back me up if need be. With one fist clenched, I wrench the door open. Then I sigh in annoyance to see a disheveled woman with wide, frightened eyes.

  “Edith. What brings you here?” I demand with gritted teeth.

  Alexander nudges me with his elbow and I remember his agenda—and my part with that.

  “Please, come inside,” I reluctantly tell her.

  She sniffles but walks inside. When the light from the entryway reaches her, I can see that her eyes are puffy and red from crying.

  “What is it? Are you hurt?” I question.

  As she shakes her head, another tear rolls out and she glances at Alexander. “No. I wanted to speak to my sister.”

  I could go mad because four minutes have long passed and I am supposed to be deep inside of my future wife. Instead, I’m conversing with these two fools.

  “Not tonight. You may come again tomorrow and see her. Do you need money for a room at the inn?”

  She won’t stay under my roof. If Alexander wants her so damn much, he can take her to wherever it is he’s staying.

  “Please, Lord Thomas, it’s rather urgent,” she begs tearfully.

  I’m about to shut her down again when Alexander speaks. “Edith, your sister will soon have a life here. A life that shouldn’t involve you and will not include William. Your family is poor now and your degree worthless without a husband to support you. I propose that you and I marry for business reasons.”

  Her eyes widen, but she quietly waits for him to finish.

  “In order to inherit my family empire, my father wants assurance that I’m married and settled. As my brother here knows, I will never settle. The idea of sleeping beside the same dull woman each night has me wanting to slit my wrists. But taking over and inheriting my father’s money does excite me. If you marry me strictly for business purposes, I will provide financially for any interest you desire. You will have the finest clothes and foods. I’ll even pay for secret lovers.”

  She’s long dried her tears as she listens with rapt attention. “Sounds enticing.”

  I scoff at her words. “Moments ago, you were wailing about your sister, and now? Now, you’re ready to hop into the coach with Alexander?”

  This woman is a calculating bitch.

  “I think that Countess Dumont is a fitting title,” Alexander snarls and pins me with a glare.

  Edith’s eyes widen and a slow grin forms on her lips. “You’re an Earl?”

  He raises an eyebrow in smugness. “A rich one.”

  “It seems so simple,” she murmurs. The excitement rippling from her is palpable. She’s thrilled for this insane opportunity.

  “That it is, sugar. That it is. Would you kindly follow me into the study and I’ll draft a contract?”

  She reaches a hand for him and he takes it. “Lead the way, kind sir.”

  Unreal.

  Elisabeth’s sister is nothing more than a well-paid prostitute.

  And she sickens me.

  THE CORSET IS TIGHT, AND the moment it falls from my body, I gasp for some much-needed air. Normally, I’m not one to wear them, but since they’ve been included in my wardrobe here at Jasper’s estate, I find it rude not to wear what was given to me.

  Tiny butterflies have been fluttering in my belly since the moment I admitted to myself that I do want to make love to this man. Jasper might have taken me under the wildest of circumstances, but I’d be a fool to deny the obvious chemistry we have together. My family—William—are quickly becoming second place to the man who has easily stolen first.

  Jasper.

  My goodness, the way he looked tonight at dinner. Dark eyes visually devouring every surface of my body, focusing on my lips or the way my breasts would jiggle as I spoke. And even though I know that the man wants my body—to take my innocence away—more than anything, I feel as though he does love me as he says.

  I always thought that what I felt for William was love. And maybe it was to a certain degree, but now, I realize I idolized the idea of him. Fascinated over what we could be. Yet with Jasper, my heart beats out of control in my chest whenever he is near. I become flushed and needy for his touch. My heart yearns to hear his romantic words—to feel his gentle yet firm caresses.

  My eyes fall on the mirror in my room and I smile at it. The smile is one of mystery, and I appear sexy. For once in my life, I don’t feel like the girl waiting with bated breath for her man to come back and marry her. For once, I feel desired beyond humanly possible. Sexier than any woman on the planet.

  I feel wanted.

  Desired.

  Needed.

  Loved.

  Now, the smile turns into a happy one. The pure bliss on my features is surprising. Who knew that, o
nly days ago, I was dreading my future? Yet now, I want to forget the past and run hand in hand with Jasper toward it.

  I want to make love to him.

  I want him to own me with his body and his soul.

  I want to be his and only his.

  I’m about to slip the cashmere robe over my naked flesh when I hear a noise at the open window. Turning quickly, I gasp to see William of all people climbing through.

  “What are you doing here?” I hiss.

  His eyes darken as he blatantly stares at my breasts. After yanking the robe from the bed, I shrug into it and tug it around me so that I’ll end his free show.

  Once our eyes finally do meet, his are filled with sadness. Something in my heart feels bad for him. I raise my eyebrows in question, and he lets out an exaggerated sigh.

  “You’re so beautiful, Lissa. I’ve missed you so much,” he says in a low voice as he takes a step toward me.

  Lissa.

  Funny how I forgot about her.

  The name of a girl.

  Instinctively, I retreat a bit and repeat my question. “What are you doing here?”

  His eyebrows pinch together as if he’s angry with my words. “Dammit, Lissa. What’s happened? You’ve changed. You’re so different.”

  I purse my lips before I finally speak. “William, it had to be done to spare my father’s farm. You and I both know this. Your being here tonight only makes things harder on the both of us. I’m sorry, but I think you should leave before Jasper finds you.”

  A possessive growl rips from his throat as he stalks over to me. I stumble back, but he captures me with his strong hands on my biceps.

  “Don’t tell me he’s brainwashed you already. Don’t deny that you love me anymore.”

  I bite on my lip and his eyes fall to them. It reminds me of the way Jasper looked at them earlier today. However, when Jasper was eating them up with his eyes, I felt satisfaction and desire. Now, with William, I feel awkward.

  No fluttering butterflies.

  No blushing.

  No need to fan myself.

  “William, things are over between us. I’m so sorry. It has to be that way.”