Becoming Lady Thomas (Becoming Her Book 1) Read online

“I’ll be right down,” I promise so that he’ll leave me be.

  Once I’m sure he’s gone, I let curiosity get the best of me and open the armoire. Inside, it’s stuffed full of expensive fabrics—dresses and petticoats I could only ever dream of wearing. I run my hand over a corset and can’t help the smile that forms on my lips. I’ve never had the opportunity to dress up for anything. The dresses I did own were hand-me-downs from that of my older sister. A part of me wants to be pretty.

  For him.

  My skin flushes, and I sit back down on the bed. Guilt consumes me because I’m thinking about Jasper and his magical wizard hands instead of my William, who is probably grieving for me with a sore jaw.

  Who have I become?

  I don’t deserve William. He waited for me for four long years only for me to be whisked away by some rich, pompous arse.

  A handsome, pompous arse.

  I fan myself with my hand and lie back on the bed. The towel I wrapped myself up in after my bath falls open, and a breeze from the open window swirls in, chilling my flesh.

  Can I really win this bet against Lord Thomas?

  I’m not ready to lose my virginity to him yet.

  No.

  I’m not ready to lose my virginity to him ever.

  Closing my eyes, I remember the way he owned a part of me that nobody ever has. I also remember the way William was planning to take my innocence so long ago. There is a difference I’ve been ignoring. Jasper made me want to make love by pleasing and teasing my body. William was ready to shove it right in without any pleasure on my end.

  My God, why am I comparing them?

  There should be no contest. William is my love, not Jasper.

  Sitting up, I make a decision. Tonight, I’m going to make myself so irresistible to him that he’ll barely be able to contain himself. I’ll make him want to take me. With this thought, the realization that I’ll be setting myself up for hardship no matter what floods through me. If I win, that means Jasper will have stolen my innocence against my will. If he wins, that means I will have given it up willingly.

  Either way, he’ll have taken me.

  Jasper.

  The idea of him being inside me, causing me to feel more of what he teased me with earlier, sends ripples of excitement running through me. He doesn’t have to know I am curious about how he would feel. That I desire it more than I’ll ever admit.

  In fact, I’ll drive him to the brink of insanity, all the while claiming that I hate his very being. He’ll go mad and take me. And then I can go home to William.

  I’ll be tainted.

  A frown plays at my lips. Would William want me anymore if I’ve been used by another man? I’m unsure.

  It doesn’t matter though. I’ll be free of a loveless marriage. Father’s name and debts will be cleared. It’s simple, really.

  I take my time dressing even though I’ve already been summoned for supper. Nearly an hour later, I’m dabbing on a squirt of one of the many vials of perfume I discovered in the washroom when the bedroom door swings open.

  “Dammit, woman. I’ve been waiting for too damn long. If this is some petulant game you’re playing—” he roars, but his words die in his throat upon seeing me.

  “I’m sorry,” I tell him innocently. “I got a little caught up in playing dress-up.”

  His dark eyes have fallen to my chest, and I feel my skin heat up. The corset I’m wearing pushes my breasts up, giving them the most breathtaking cleavage they’ve ever had.

  “My God,” he growls. “You’re absolutely stunning.”

  I can barely breathe in this thing, but with his hungry gaze, he steals the only breath I have left.

  “I, uh . . . Thank you.”

  After stalking toward me, he invades my space as he places his hands on my hips and pulls me to him. “I want you so incredibly much, honeysuckle. My cock aches to plunge into your tight heat. Please let me have you.”

  I gulp but press my palms against his chest and push him away. “No. You and I both know it’s not going to happen.”

  As I retreat, he encroaches on me. I don’t stop until the wall behind me prevents me from going any farther. His hands slide into my hair, which now hangs in loose waves down my back. Tilting my head up, he captures my lips with his. I can taste liquor on his tongue, and I wish for a drink of my own, because in my sober state, I’m not sure I have the nerve to keep him away. The desire to block out everything but him is strong.

  He breaks away after a heated kiss and stares down at me. “Dear Elisabeth, it’s going to happen.”

  I shake my head, but when he dips his head down and suckles on my neck, I lose all sense of reality. The room spins as I give in. I give in to his touches and caresses, the way he cups my breasts through my dress, the way he teases my earlobe with his tongue and then teeth. I’m moments away from begging him to do his worst when my stomach grumbles loudly.

  He begins to chuckle. “Honeysuckle, we need to get some food in that belly. You’re going to need the energy for what I plan to do to your body later.”

  The wind breezes through the room again and causes me to shiver. I’m unsure if it’s the chill of the air or the heat of his words. One thing is certain. I’m affected by him whether I like it or not.

  “Come.” He smirks before grabbing hold of my hand and pulling me out of the room.

  As we walk down the ornate hallways, I can’t help but wonder if I would feel the same way had there never been a relationship between William and me. Would I easily let this man into my heart and into my bed?

  I think I would.

  And that horrifies me.

  We make our way into the opulent dining room, and Jasper drags a chair out for me to sit. Once we’ve been seated, Gretchen sets to dishing out foods I’ve never even seen before. Everything I sample is much saltier and richer in taste than I’m used to. And I find myself guzzling the wine to wash down the unusual flavors.

  Gretchen eventually clears the table aside from our wineglasses. Dinner consisted of surprisingly pleasant conversation, mostly of Jasper telling me about some of the sights worth seeing in the city. I’d almost forgotten I was here against my will until he spoke again.

  “If William loved you like you say, why didn’t he marry you the day you turned eighteen?” he questions with a narrowed gaze, as if he’s truly trying to work out the reasoning in his head.

  His words catch me off guard, so I drain my wineglass while I decide on how to answer him.

  “Um, good question,” I spit out bitterly. “He had his ‘reasons’.”

  He raises a dark eyebrow at me but wisely doesn’t speak.

  “What if I don’t want to talk about it?” I ask.

  “If you’re going to be my wife, I must know things about you. This is something that piques my curiosity. I wonder how it is that someone would let someone like you slip through his fingertips. You’re a unique and polished ruby I was lucky enough to stumble upon. I’ll never let you slip away.”

  I want to remind him that I have no plans to be his wife, but I instead find odd comfort in his words. The day I turned eighteen without a word from William, I was beyond stung. I was heartbroken. It wasn’t until a few days later that I received his letter.

  I blink the tears away once I’ve recited the memorized letter to him and find that Jasper is watching me with clenched teeth.

  “That was it? Some ridiculous notion that you needed to wait for him to graduate?”

  Nodding, I lift my hand and swipe a stray tear from my cheek. Even though the letters kept us in continuous communication, the love I had for him had dimmed that night in the barn before he left. I spent the next four years pining over the idea of him. And when he arrived yesterday, I was spellbound by his presence. Intrigued with the way he had changed.

  Yet I still had the same uncomfortable feeling I’d had in the barn all those years ago.

  Jasper reaches over and takes hold of my hand. “Honeysuckle, I will have a ring on that finger
within four nights’ time, I can assure you of that. In fact, I might even pay to have the jeweler rush the design of it. I cannot bear another moment without it on that elegant finger of yours.”

  He squeezes my hand, and I award him with a smile. I imagined I would seduce this man into taking me, and now, here I am, enjoying his company. I didn’t tell anyone, not even Ella, of the heartache I’d felt when he sent that letter. Yet I told this stranger.

  “I want to hold you, Elisabeth.”

  For some reason, I want him to hold me too.

  HER EYES ARE SO INFINITELY sad. It pains me to see the heartache. That bastard of a man thinks he can push her away for four long years only to return and have the right to wed her. Yet I, having only known of her existence for only a couple of months, would be willing to give up everything to be with her. Luckily, I don’t have to give up anything. I just have to make sure she doesn’t leave me.

  I made a deal with the scarlet-haired devil.

  But she’s nothing more than an angel in my eyes.

  “Please, let me hold you,” I tell her as I stand from the table.

  Her hesitation is brief, but she eventually nods her approval and allows me to pull her to her feet. I want to be a gentleman and offer her my elbow so I can escort her, but when she stumbles slightly, I realize she may need more than an arm.

  “Dear woman, are you drunk?” I question with amusement.

  When a giggle bursts from her, the smile on my face is immediate. Her green eyes find mine and shine with an emotion I want to see more of. She almost seems happy—here with me.

  “I don’t think I can walk,” she whispers conspiratorially.

  Now, I’m tickled. “Well then, I shall carry you, honeysuckle.”

  Her cheeks blaze, but she slides a hand up my chest, preparing herself to be picked up. I don’t hesitate at all and scoop her into my arms. Even with all of her clothing on, she’s still light as can be. I’ll have to get her to eat a little more if she’s going to mine—I need her to have curves and more to grab on to.

  “How old are you, Jasper?” she questions as I stride down the dimly lit hallway.

  Briefly, I glance down at her inquisitive eyes before speaking. “Thirty-three.”

  Her mouth forms an “O,” but she doesn’t say any more. I’m over a decade older than she is, but it doesn’t matter. Age has never deterred me from anything. I took this business over from my father when he passed away when I was only eighteen years of age. Men who owed my father suddenly thought they had been given a free pass when he died. Unfortunately for them, I was tougher than my father and had something to prove. I gave them absolutely no leeway and collected in some form on every debt that was owed.

  Now, fifteen years later, I have a reputation that states that I’m not a man to be messed with. The word in this town is that, if the debt is not honored, I will take what is owed without hesitation. Whether it be a life or a daughter or a farm. I. Will. Take. It.

  “Where are we going?” she asks as I open a door at the end of the hallway.

  I flash her an easy smile. “We’re going into my quarters. If I’m going to hold you, I want to do it in my bed.”

  Her eyes widen, and I see the fear in them.

  “Honeysuckle, don’t fret. I won’t hurt you. It will be more comfortable there. My bed is far larger than the one in the guest room.”

  Seeming satisfied with my answer, she rests her head against my shoulder. I don’t miss the fact that she inhales me. The thought of her wanting me as much as I want her thickens my cock.

  Once I’ve entered the room and closed the door behind me, I saunter over to the bed and set her down in front of it. She watches me with interest when I begin to pull my top coat off. I take the time to neatly fold it and drape it over the chair beside the bed. Pretty soon, I’ve removed my bow tie and started on the buttons on my dress shirt.

  In her drunken state, she stares at me unabashedly. The fact that she seems eager to see my chest delights me. To tease her, I slowly remove the crisp, white shirt, my eyes ever watching her. For effect, I let it drop to the floor.

  Her eyes lift to mine. “What are you doing?” Those pretty, green orbs stay on mine for a moment before she’s staring at my chest again.

  “I’m getting comfortable so I may hold you. You should do the same,” I tell her gruffly as I take a step toward her. I expect her to retreat as she’s done before, but instead, she lifts her chin and faces me bravely.

  “I’ll need help untying the back.” She turns and tugs her hair over one shoulder to reveal the open back.

  Her snow-colored skin invites me to mark it up. One day soon, I shall leave “love notes” from my mouth all over her body.

  Reaching toward her, I grasp the end of the ribbon she managed to tie tight by herself while dressing and pull it toward me. Her petticoat loosens as the ribbon slips through the eyelets. Once I’ve loosened it enough, I push it down in a gentle way down her body. After the dress makes it over her hips, it falls to the floor in a heap.

  “Comfortable yet?” I ask. Dipping down, I place a kiss on her shoulder.

  She shivers but shakes her head. “I can’t breathe well in this thing. Can you help me out of this as well?”

  I’m glad she cannot see my features at the moment because the grin on my face is that of a schoolboy—so eager and excited, such a far cry from my normally cool demeanor. As I unhook each fastener of her corset, I wonder how in the hell she managed to get into this thing by herself. Perhaps Gretchen helped her. If it were Gerald, I would have to murder him with my own two hands. No other man shall ever touch her flesh again. She belongs to me.

  I free the last fastener and the corset drops to the floor with her dress. Taking a step back, I nearly curse aloud from the sight. This vixen of a woman isn’t wearing any knickers or other undergarments. She sat through dinner with her pussy open and waiting, and I was a fool for not having picked up on her exotic scent—a fool for not having climbed under the table and feasting upon the dessert that is her.

  As if she knows that her body teases me, she takes her time crawling up onto the bed, baring her ass at me. Everything in me screams to grab hold of those hips and yank her to me—to bend her over this bed and fuck her into oblivion. The sane part of me—the businessman—remembers that we have a deal. She’ll have to want me to make love to her. I’ll need to hear her beg before I grant her my cock inside her.

  “You’re a tease, Elisabeth,” I growl as I tug my trousers down. After stepping out of them and my shoes, I climb after her onto my massive bed.

  The evening air has taken a chilly turn, and a gust breezes in from the open window. I clutch the thick blanket at the bottom of the bed and pull it up over us.

  “This is awkward,” she murmurs. Her hands are neatly clasped over her belly and she won’t make eye contact with me. I suppose someone as inexperienced as she would think that lying naked in bed together would seem awkward.

  “How do you suppose we rectify that?” I muse aloud.

  She shrugs her shoulders and exhales a nervous breath. Enough of this nonsense.

  “I’m going to taste your nipple,” I tell her boldly.

  She begins to protest, but as I slip under the covers and suck it into my mouth, she cries out in surprise.

  “Jas—that—oh—my—”

  Her words are cut short when I take a soft bite of her flesh. She tastes like perfection—so sweet. As I tease her breast with my mouth, I squeeze the other one with my free hand. My honeysuckle writhes against my touch. The whimpers of pleasure that come from her body cause my cock to grow thick and hard.

  “You’re supposed to be holding me,” she whispers.

  “Where shall I hold you?” I question against her nipple as I start sliding my hand along her belly. The moment my finger grazes the hair on her cunt, she freezes. “Here?”

  She doesn’t speak. Instead, she begins to breathe quickly. I’ll take that as permission. Lifting my head up as I lazily
stroke her clitoris, I grin at her. Her eyes are lust laden.

  “Honeysuckle, does my finger feel good there?”

  Biting down on her lip, she nods once.

  “Do you know what will feel better?” I ask with a raised eyebrow.

  Her head shakes from side to side. Instead of answering right away, I slowly kiss her pale skin as I inch my way down her belly. The breaths coming from her are erratic with occasional kitten-like mewls. This woman wants me whether she wants to admit it or not.

  When I reach the scarlet hair between her legs, I inhale her.

  So fucking sweet.

  “What are you doing?” she murmurs.

  The blanket has drifted along with me, so when I lift my head, I can see her peering down at me with a mix of horror and excitement.

  “Darling, I’m going to draw an orgasm from you with my tongue.”

  Her eyes go wide at my proclamation. But as I blow a breath of hot air on her pussy, she slams them shut. Then I take hold of both of her slender thighs and part her open for me. The sight is breathtaking—her body just begs to be tasted and fucked.

  I run my thumb along the slit and am pleased to find her wet with arousal. Seeing her juices glistening on my thumb has me deciding to have a little sample of her there first before I finish with my task of pleasuring her. With a dip of my head, I bring my tongue between the lips of her southern region and run it upwards, lapping up her essence.

  My God, she’s heavenly.

  “Oh!” she wails, her fingers tangling into my hair.

  Her clear enjoyment encourages me, so I set to licking every inch of the flesh between her legs. My tongue punishes her in a delicious way, and I groan in pleasure when she shamelessly pushes my head against her—needing more from me. Using my thumbs to open her up to me, I thrust my tongue into her cunt.

  So tight.

  So fucking tight.

  The walls of her pussy clench around my tongue, and for a moment, I wonder how she’ll ever be able to take the size of my cock. I bury my face deeper into her, my nose connecting with her clit, and she loses her mind.

  “Don’t stop!” she shrieks and holds me in place.